There are people who get off to people stomping on cake so I can guarantee all of you that someone finds you arousing
One shot or one chugg one fckn set of chesty pushups ahahaha fuck with ittt 20eaxxbb
vic pls drink some water
In the dramatic reading how would that last thing be pronounced
chris-speaks-cat
Finally finished season 2 of Archer.
I will watch one episode of season 3.
ONE. JUST ONE I SWEAR.
BUT SEASON 3 BEGINS AS A 3-PART SERIES
joelannajoel
A lot of you are so mean on here and pretty sarcastic like grow up
(via wearesexbobombs)
queenofslash
so we were talking about sexism in maths and i sit on a table with all boys, and i said “you know women could all agree to stop having sex with men and essentially stop the human race” and this one boy goes “well boys could all agree to stop having sex with women and-” but this other boy cut him off like “yeah dude that ain’t gonna happen” and i died
(via wearesexbobombs)
fasterfood
a white girl is lost in the woods and is about to be attacked by a bear. “why cant we all just be friends, bullying is so stupid, stop bullying <3” she says to it. the bear stops. he is confused. how the hell did she just say <3 out loud
(via gentlemasquerade)
i called my grandpa to wish him a happy 69th birthday and he said, “I skipped straight to 70. I don’t do 69 anymore, I’m too old to bend that way” and started laughing hysterically
grandpa
(via ineverclaimedtobeasavior)
Preganin inn the parking lot with hifhh life though we about tha th hella Asians uppo inbhurr ahahah I missed my aunt fuck itbshr Nat sis
Ladies and gentlemen, Vic Tran.
Vic Tran: the mascot of tumblr’s drunks
It’s 10:27 pm. The party is thumpin’. Vic Tran spots a lady. She’s 5’3”, Korean, perky C cups. He walks up to her, brushes his hair back, and straightens his glasses. His clothes fit just right, there’s no way she CAN’T notice him, and he knows it.
He goes to introduce himself to her, he opens his mouth and says “Preganin inn the parking lot with hifhh life though we about tha th hella Asians uppo inbhurr ahahah I missed my aunt fuck itbshr Nat sis”
